Both have kids, but they hate each other

[polly1]

So you really like this guy your dating. You finally bring your kids together because things are going great. Wow! The hate each other and just will not even try. I have had this happen to me. We decided to just not see each other anymore. We were both looking for a long term relationship but our kids just would not cooperate. I guess they were too young. I have two he had two. All boys. I can`t bring someone into my life if it is going to be that stressful. We both had custody of our kids so we would have all lived together. We did remain friends though.

[hermana]

Polly, I think that makes absolute sense! It would be way too stressful to try to bring together 2 families where the kids weren't open in any way to any sort of connection with each other. If they hated each other, that would be even worse! I'm so sorry.

[DatingDiva]

I think this is the kids way of expressing their hurt of you not being with their other biological parent. These kids probably did not have enough time to make a sound judgment on each others character to determine if they like each other, so it's all surface. I say sit them down and talk with them separately and then together.

[Claria]

It is important to make sure your children get along with their step parent but I also think you should not let it be to the extreme that the children are choosing who you can date or if you can date for that matter.

[dizzy]

Staying friends over this time could be a good thing, who knows what could happen in the future? I had an ex roommate like this (years later of course) but in the end she hooked back up with the guy in a few years, the kids were fine and they got married about two years ago.

[Laudia]

Children are usually picky when it comes to having their parents start dating after getting divorced or having some other tragic experience. Their feelings should be important to you but you need to find out why it is they don't like the person.